this is leigh. hehe. wala lang. gusto ko lang siyang ilagay dito. pero ndi siya cute sa pictures na ito.

for today, i've already drunk 3 glasses of black gulaman w/ almond jelly, and i'm planning to drink yet another one while watching tv later [i haven't watched the phone yet hehe. =)] i've already finished 5 sections of one of my nmat reviewers. so far, my score is 214/250. i don't know if that's good enough. ndi pa ako nag-start sa physics at chem dahil marami na akong nakalimutan. i would have to read stuff first. sa social science naman, as if naman may alam ako [kami?] doon. i don't know if it's just me, but i really didn't learn much from soc sci 1. hehe. =) nakakatamad mag-review at tinatamad din akong pumasok ng school. *sigh*

sa totoo lang, wala naman akong masulat dito. kaya ito na lang. got this from cza [i've done a little editing]:

WHAT REALLY HURTS...
- letting go of a person you've just learned to love
- reminiscing the good times you shared together
- trying to hide what you really feel
- trying to hide the tears that involuntarily fall from your eyes
- loving a person too much
- giving up someone you never thought of giving up
- having the right love at the wrong time
- taking the risk to fall in love again
- thinking of him every waking and sleeping moment knowing all the while that he never even thinks a single thought of you
- letting go, because everytime you see the person, you only fall deeper
- holding back only to find out when it's too late that you both felt the same way but were only scared to lose each other so much that you didn't let the feelings out
- falling in love with someone you didn't mean to fall in love with
- finding the perfect guy... with only one problem... he doesn't love you
- seeing the one you love crying for someone else
- the waiting also hurts like hell
- having to hear "i've met someone..."
- agreeing to his wish to "just be friends"
- breaking someone's heart
- pretending you're okay when inside you're dying
- pretending to be strong and recognizing your weakness
- lying in bed each night, thinking of that special person you can never have
- being with someone you can't actually love
- pretending you don't love a person whom you actually love
- being in love
- letting go even if you really don't want to
- seeing the person you love hurt because of you and not being able to help that person
- having to face the fact that someone is capable of completely destroying the wall that you have set for yourself, leaving you weak and vulnerable
- admitting that you love someone despite his imperfections
- finding out that the more you try to hate him, the more you end up loving him, perhaps even more than before
- the thought that this guy used to really love you and you loved him as well but you didn't give enough so he gave up on you
- making a promise and realizing that when the time has come for that promise to be delivered, the commitment is no longer there
- the hardest thing about love -- believing it exists

why i am i posting this? i don't know. i guess it just struck me as... um, reality? about the last line... as hard as it is to believe esp. when one is hurting, love does exist. it's just that love is not something that comes in a silver platter. the pain that comes with a broken heart is more than enough proof of love's existence; there is no great pain if there is no great love. its existence may be eternal or ephemeral, but just the same, it's there to teach each and everyone of us the greatest lesson in life that we could ever learn... what am i talking about?! am i making sense? this is just one of those sabog moments. hehe. =)

word of the day: bi · nu · lu´ tot [as pronounced by mahal] v. sent through bluetooth ["blinuetooth" hehe =)]

---~*~---
"i need you like water
like breath, like rain
i need you like mercy
from heaven's gate..."

haha. laugh trip talaga 'to. benta! or sadyang mababaw lang ako. hehe. pero, nakakatawa siya talaga eh. nagyaya k'se si ethel na lumabas kami. kaya lang, nalagas... so apat lang kami natira: ets, jd, kennard, ako. dami talaga namin! hehe. oh well, okay lang. thanks kay ets sa pag-suggest sa movie na 'to 'coz i really enjoyed watching it. actually, wala kaming plan kung ano gagawin namin so ayun nanood, kumain, at naglakad lang kami hanggang mapagod. haha. next time ulit. =)

so wala na naman akong masabi ngayon. basta, magsisimula na akong mag-review for the nmat. kinabahan k'se ako when i read gerald's entry about the nmat eh. paano nga kaya kung ndi ako maka-40 percentile? waaah. i really have to review. lalo na sa socio stuff. paano ba naman k'se un barbero soc sci 1 namin. haha. =)

habang nag-uusap kami nila ets kanina, na-realize ko na ang tagal ko pa mag-aaral. wala lang, i mean, most of my batchmates are going to graduate by 2007. eh ako... 2010! at ndi pa un ang end ng pag-aaral ko. may residency at kung anu-ano pa. hirap mag-doctor... kaya i don't understand why a lot of doctors take up nursing after going through a decade of medical studies. ndi biro un 'no! wala lang, parang sayang naman 'di ba? i guess they just want to go abroad... pero, kahit na. basta. weird. ang tanong: kakayanin ko ba 'to? kailangan. this is what i want to do, but sometimes i'm just not so sure if i possess the makings of a good doctor. for all i know, baka mamaya i wasn't made for this profession at nagfee-feeling lang ako. haha. =) pero ito na gusto ko since i was a kid. i really want to learn, and as corny as it may sound, i want to be of service to others. [totoo 'yan! that's one thing that i learned here in up.] so un, basta ndi ako papasok sa surgery. ndi stable ang aking mga kamay eh. as of now, i plan to go into oncology. if not, siguro pediatrics. =)

hay, nakuha ko na lahat ng grades ko. [thanks to tara & ants! =) super!] kainis! ang aking average... 1.452380952! waaah! sayang, ndi ako umabot ng US! huhu. ano ba un... sumobra pa ng 0.002380952. ang hula k'se ng dakilang prof sa hum 1 ay 1.25, ndi pa inuno. aba, parehong 1.5 nga ung hula n'ya sa akin sa kom 1 & 2, daya nga nun eh. haaay. sayang naman. hanggang pangarap na lang ang US! hahaha. =) hay naku, isang malaking outlier ang grade ko sa org chem. kadiri talaga un. hinatak average ko. waaah!!! hehe, wala lang. happy na rin ako k'se kahit paano tumaas ang grade ko. kailangan na silang i-appreciate k'se pagdating daw ng med proper, best friend mo na ang mga dos. hehe. =)

nakalimutan namin mag-take ng picture. si ken pala, may kinuhang pic. ito:


hahaha! kaaway ko! joke. =)

---~*~---
"tell me it's not over now, will you?
so i won't be hanging around
and you won't see me crying..."

nagkita kami ng ilang upis people [bry, cherry, giselle, ivy, meg, patty, tara] ngayon sa sm north. wala pala kaming plan kung anong gagawin namin. hehe. =) pero okay lang naman, masaya pa rin. =) kumain kami sa shakey's.





dumaan din kami sa petshop. dahil doon, gusto ko tuloy bumili ng chow chow kaya lang... oh my god, the price? P30,000!!! nakakainis naman, ang mahal-mahal... ung japanese spitz nga dito sa bahay, bigay lang ng kapitbahay eh. so ang wish ko, magkaroon ng kapitbahay na may chow chow para mabiyayaan din ako nun. hehe. pwede na rin kahit golden retriever, pomeranian, or shih tzu. ayun, ung shih tzu, may P14,000... haaay... nakakita rin kami nila giselle ng nemo at dory doon. ito sila:

 
clownfish & surgeonfish

hehe. wala lang. tinatamad k'se ako magsulat ngayon. i guess napagod lang ako sa kakalakad namin. nag-arcade din kami kanina. meron din akong halloween pix ni bry:


pwede na ba pang-"nginiiig" files? hehe. =)


nag-pose na naman po si bry...

haha, okay lang. nalibre naman n'ya ako ng cadbury dream. hehe. salamat, bry! =)

lesson for the day: do not play dance maniax if "you think you might be pregnant". ewan, sabi doon sa machine eh. haha. =) bakit kaya? ndi naman strenuous exercise un, esp. for someone who only might be pregnant... hehe. =)

ayan muna, nag-flood na naman ako ng pix dito. hehe. =)

---~*~---
"why do i keep hoping for a chance you'll walk back through the door?
when my heart knows there's no hope anymore
why do there have to be doors..."

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